Jun 29 2008

Supermodel Ruslana Korshunova commits suicide. Even beautiful people hurt

Published by getlaid under News Commentary

I’m always surprised when someone young and with a lot of promise commits suicide.  In what would seem a perfect life a supermodel Ruslana Korshunova talks about the pain in her life in her blog.  She actually writes quite beautifully as you can see in her poem below

Life is short,
Break the rules,
Forgive quickly,
Kiss slowly,
Love truly,
Laugh uncontrollably,
And never regret anything that made you smile.

I wrote this blog to help ugly people.  When you feel the pain of being ugly remember even beautiful people hurt.  I wonder if there are more ugly people killing themselves.

Ruslana Korshunova

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Jun 23 2008

Gas prices are a good thing…

Published by getlaid under News Commentary

If you havent realized yet these record high gas prices are a good thing.  Sure it might hurt now and cause your pocketbook to shrink.  But in the long run its fantastic!  Arent you sick of these oil companies raking you over the coals, and those damn arabs having all that money and absolutely no talent.  Within 20 years we will have replaced all our current fleet of automobiles into a far more fuel economic fleet severely reducing our dependence on oil for our transportation needs.  We will also have come up with many new alternatives.  We can already do this but the oil company lobby is strong.  Imagine a car with a sunroof thats a giant solar panel, fans in the front that are turbines that generate power from the movement of your car as well as current hybrid technology should let us get over 100 miles per gallon.  Just to show you why its our own fault…Honda made the Insight in 2000 and sold a palrty 18,000 automobiles over a six year run.  They stopped production of this car because of lackluster sales.  The Honda Insight got an average of 70+ miles per gallon and if you drove it softly  you could easily surpass over 100mpg. When the Insight came out gas was $1.39 a gallon.  Think about that one.  If the price does not go up the “average American” will not give a shit!  The only way to keep the planet alive and save our precious resources is the raise the price.  So you know what FUCK YOU ALL lets get that price up!

Honda Insight

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May 14 2008

Features I want in the new iPhone 2.0 coming out

Published by getlaid under Cool Stuff, News Commentary

new iphone 2.0

so I sold my iPhone today in response to the announcement that there might be a new iPhone released in the next few weeks.  There are rumors that AT&T will be offering rebates to bring down the price of the iPhone below 200$ so instead of taking a hit on the resale value of my phone I sold it.  Now here are the features I think will be on the new iPhone that should have been there in the first place.

 

  1. Choice of colors
  2. Camera in the front or one that rotates
  3. Thinner design about the size of the iPod Touch
  4. Slide out keyboard
  5. Copy and paste
  6. 3G high speed internet
  7. Modem capability
  8. GPS
  9. A non recessed earphone connection so I can use other headphones
  10. Foward text messages
  11. Send text messages to more than one person
  12. Record conversations
  13. Sync calendar and contacts with google calendar
  14. Sideways text messaging
  15. Better Camera resolution
  16. Stereo headphone bluetooth support
Now come on out with it already!!!!!

 

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May 08 2008

Can you really be rehabilitated after smoking Marijuana from someone’s skull?

Published by getlaid under News Commentary

These kids from Humble, Texas did just that.  They dug up a corpse and then proceeded to chop off its head and smoke weed from its head.  This brings to mind numerous questions.  

  1. Can you get sick from doing this?
  2. How the hell do you smoke anything from the skull? There are too many holes and where do you put the weed?  
  3. How much weed can you fit in a skull?
  4. Whatever happened to the good ol’days of skull fucking someone’s corpse
  5. And the most obvious question…WHY!!!!!
This demented kids must be put in jail for a VERY long time.  If you ask me they shouldn’t be let out.  This is how serial killers/mass murderers get their start.  Especially in this case its not a prank you can goto school and tell all your friends about.  Um…yeah Billy and I dug up this dude last night, chopped off his head and smoked some weed in it.  COOL! AWESOME BRO!!!  Nope this is the kind of shit that freaks people out and you end up being the loner nutcase kid at school that smokes weeds out of human skulls.  I can see the guy on the right smoking weed out a  human skull he kinda has that look to him, but the guy on the left actually looks like just another A-hole kid in high school.  Regardless these kids should be put in jail for life.

 

photos

Matthew Gonzalez, left, and Kevin Jones have been charged with the misdemeanor offense of abuse of a corpse.

 

 

May 8, 2008, 2:45PM
3 accused of using corpse head to smoke pot

Two men and a juvenile are accused of digging up a corpse, decapitating the body and using the head to smoke marijuana, according to court documents.

Matthew Gonzalez and Kevin Jones have been charged with the misdemeanor offense of abuse of a corpse, said Scott Durfee, a spokesman for the Harris County District Attorneys Office.

According to documents filed in the case, Gonzalez, Jones and an unnamed juvenile on March 15 went to an Humble cemetery, dug up a man’s grave, left with the head and turned it into a “bong.”

Gonzalez told authorities about the incident Wednesday, and showed officers the defaced grave, including a 4-foot hole. Because of a heavy rain, officers were unable to determine whether the casket or the body had been disturbed.

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May 08 2008

Antonio Pierce Interning on the Howard Stern Show

Published by getlaid under Cool Stuff

Antonio Peirce

If anyone heard the Howard Stern show this morning Antonio Pierce from the world Champion New York Giants was interning there.  You gotta give it to a guy like this who is surrounded by macho guys in the NFL to come on and talk about the things he did and be a lowly intern.  I thought it was an excellent public relations move for him and introduced him to a whole new legion of fans.  I for one who does not watch football am now a big fan of Antonio’s and plan to follow his career.  Antonio talked about many things including gays in the NFL, the dangers of playing football, his upbringing in Compton, his fiancee, and the cars he drives.  Antonio smacked around Sal and Richard with towels, got pranked on the phone, and taught the staff how to throw footballs.  Lets hope the NFL does not dislike anything Antonio said on the show and levy any fines or penalties.  Its always great to see a football player be a everyday normal guy and connect with the fans.  If you want to read the details of the show you can head over to Marksfriggin.com and read the entire transcript.

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May 08 2008

Top 10 Jackie Chan Fight moves

Published by getlaid under Cool Stuff

If you love Kung Fu movies then you are probably a big fan of Jackie Chan movies. I’ve been a fan of Jackie Chan since I saw him in Drunken Master. Jackie has the charisma and humor you wouldn’t expect out of a action movie star. Check out these incredible top 10 fight scenes courtesy of JamesNintendoNerd of Cinemasscre.com

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May 07 2008

Match.com online dating expert Ron Jeezy

Published by getlaid under Online Dating Advice

Ron Jeezy a certified online dating expert will be writing on here to help guide you through the best tips and strategies to ensure that you get the best out of your match.com profile. Ron Jeezy is a avid internet dater and has met thousands of beautiful women online. He will be giving you daily tips on optimizing your profile to ensure you get the most matches on match.com as well as other dating sites. Using his techniques you should be able to get more eyeballs on your profile and your balls on more womens chins.

Ron Jeezy will also profile women he is currently working on and keep you updated on his progress with them.

Stay tuned..

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May 07 2008

How to pick up women at the local Starbucks

Published by getlaid under Pickup Strategies

Cup of Average Joe?

Starbucks is the place to pick up women…

So i’m at Stabucks right now trying to concentrate on my studies but I just can’t…I’m at one of the big 24 hour ones near the hotteset part of town in Houston. All I see is the hottest women walking in and out. I’ve realized that this is one of the best places in town to meet women. There is no easier way to meet chicks in town than at this place. Its better than any nightclub or bar you can go to. Its got all the aspects of a nightclub you would want without any of the shortcomings. Its well lit, got music, drinks and food, and the music is just the right volume to where you can actually have a conversation. You can see its late and the women here are single and horny. I can already tell the ones that want to meet a guy. You can see it in their eyes as they glance up every time someone new walks in with hopes that he might talk to them. If you watch their eyes and they look up a lot that means they are more interested in meeting someone than they are to study for their final exams which are this week. Those are the women you want to target. I recommend taking a quick stroll around to find those women. Try to find one with glancing eyes and a empty seat next to her. Then start studying and listening to the conversation around you. If one interests you then jump in the conversation with either a witty or deep though. What an easy way to get yourself into a conversation. Another technique I would try is to leave your laptop or books down and ask the girl if she can watch them for you while you get a quick coffee. Then ask her if she wants anything and give her a quick smile. This way you have already broken the ice and you can continue the conversation when you get back. Go get your coffee come back and then say thank you for watching my stuff. Say a joke like “the last girl I asked to watch my stuff ran off with my laptop” There you go ice is broken. Next ask her what she is reading/studying and you are BOOM into the conversation. Its all downhill from there.
So to sum it up…

  1. Scope out the surroundings
  2. Sit next to a roving eyed woman
  3. Sit around for a bit
  4. Ask her to watch your stuff while you get some coffee
  5. Offer to get her something
  6. Make a joke when you get back
  7. Ask her whats shes studying for
  8. Take it from there

As a warning there are women that hate for you to pick them up at Starbucks.  Of course these are also the same women who live in a fantasy world where they think that no guy wants to pick them up and that all guys just want to be their friend.  These women also tend to have vaginas that are as dry and arid as the Gobi desert.  It is hard to spot these women based upon how they look but here is some insight from one such woman on her blog.  You can read here how she talks about hating being picked up at Starbucks and that guys who do that are preverts and creeps.

Of course we are going after those those women who are ultra receptive and at Starbucks hoping for some penis.  We shall refer to these women as “Starbucks Sluts” or “StarSluts” or “StarFucks”.  Those are who you shall target and offer them a nice hot steaming cup of Average Joe.

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May 05 2008

Josef Fritzl gets hair transplant to impress daughter in basement

Published by getlaid under News Commentary

My thoughts on the demented Josef Fritzl

I just had a feeling that creepy child molesting loser Josef Fritzl had a hair transplant. Turns out he called his wife fat and so she called him bald and he was so insecure he ran out and got a hair transplant. God look at that scrap of mesh on his scalp. Even lice would not run their fingers through his hair. If this guy gets off on an insanity plea then its going to be a huge injustice. If you are wondering why such horrible things happen in Austria dont look any further than the justice system. This is the second such case of a woman being locked up in her basement in that country in the past 5 years. The austrian justice minister has recently come out saying that he will fight any portrayal by the media to make his country look like it has a problem. The issue at hand is Austria does not have severe punishment for crimes. Double murder in that country will get you at most 15 years. Believe me if America had such a law there would be a couple of people i’d target and i’m a pretty peaceful guy. So just imagine what some violent, irrational people would do if the penalties were not so harsh.

You can see the sick hairline and the cheap plugs this loony bastard got. I guess he wanted to impress his imprisoned daughter in the basement.

 Josef Fritzl gets hair transplant to impress daughter in basement

Here is an article from the London paper that goes into more detail about the crime.

Josef Fritzl, the Austrian who kept a secret family in his cellar, would often sleep overnight with them in their windowless dungeon and hadn’t had sex with his wife upstairs for 20 years.

Fritzl went to Thailand while his daughter was locked away
EuroPics
Fritzl went to Thailand while his daughter was locked away

Mr Fritzl told his wife and second family living above ground that he was working on blueprints for machines he was making in the cellar and that he was never to be disturbed.

Details of his bizarre double life, which lasted 24 years, were revealed by his sister-in-law Christine, 56, who is a sister of Mr Fritzl’s wife Rosemarie, 68.

Christine, whose surname was not released, is the first member of Mr Fritzl’s
close family to speak publicly.

She said Mr Fritzl, 73, who was known as “Sepp”, ruled his household like a military dictatorship.

He fathered seven children with his wife. In 1984 he imprisoned one of his daughters Elisabeth, who was 18, in the cellar and then fathered another seven children by her.

Lisa, 16, Monika, 14, and Alexander, 12, grew up above ground in the house in Amstetten unaware that their siblings Kirsten, 19, Stefan, 18, and Felix, five, were in a windowless dungeon below ground.

Christine said: “Sepp had a regular routine. He would go into the cellar at 9am and spend a lot of time down there and often spend the night there.

“He said he was developing blueprints for machines he was selling. Questions about why he was down there so long were banned. Rosie wasn’t even allowed to bring him a cup of coffee.

“We knew that they never had sex and now we know why. He always put Rosie down and called her fat and said that was why they didn’t have sex.”

Mr Fritzl would make fun of Christine because of her weight, saying: “Chubby women are below my standard.”

Christine would then tell him it was “better to be chubby than bald”

Mr Fritzl was so vain about going bald that following her taunting he travelled to Vienna to have hair transplants.

Christine said: “Rosie and the children lived in complete fear of him. He was a tyrant and despot. I have always hated him.

“When he entered a room everyone had to be silent and he treated his children like a drill instructor. It was like they were in the army.

“The only chance for the children to escape was to get married as soon as they were old enough which is what they all did.

“He always laughed about crude sex jokes. I was 16 when he was arrested and locked up for rape. I found that truly disgusting especially because he had four children with my sister at that point.”

Yesterday it emerged that the children kept the cellar speak their own language using animalistic noises rather than words.

Stefan Fritzl, 18, and his brother Felix, five, learned to talk by watching a television in the dungeon. But their form of communciation is only partly intelligible to Austrian police officers.

Police chief Leopold Etz, 50, who has met the two boys, said: “It is only half true that they can speak. They communicate with noises that are a mixture of growling and cooing.

“If they want to say something so others understand them as well they have to focus and really concentrate which seems to be extremely exhausting for them.

“Felix prefers to crawl but he can walk upright if he wants.”

When he was rescued Felix pointed to the moon, which he was seeing for the first time, and said: “Is that God up there?”

He then made excited gurgling noises when he saw a cow.

Doctors said that since he emerged from his prison he is constantly excited and keeps trying to hit the air with his hand.

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